The foundational work of emotional regulation and nervous system balancing lends itself to the next area of focus in my work with emerging adolescents: relationships. My students often lack the skills necessary to engage in healthy, reciprocal, boundaried relationships with their peers. In my group, emerging adolescents begin to examine their own and their family’s value systems in new ways. They learn about basic human needs: belonging, fun, freedom, power, and safety; and they explore new, healthier ways to meet their needs each day. They also discover more of themselves by taking on new challenges each day. Students in my group get to experience being a cook, a leader, a fire-maker, a friend, a storyteller, an explorer, and so much more! These basics of identity development and exploration are essential for young people if they are to learn to maintain a stable sense of self under increased social pressure to conform.

The wilderness offers an opportunity to engage in relationships unlike any other setting. There are no doors to close, there is no quitting a relationship when things become challenging. My students work to develop skills of assertive communication including honest and vulnerable expressions of emotions and the ability to give and receive thoughtful, in the moment, feedback with their peers and staff. They practice, often for the first time in their lives, healthy repair in relationships, and they often leave us with an increased sense of confidence in their abilities to create deeper and more meaningful relationships than they once believed possible.